The worst of times, sprinkled in with some of the best.

I feel like I have aged at least 5 years in the past 5 weeks. My whole life and point of view has been forever shifted. It was the worst of times sprinkled in with a little bit of the best.

worst: watching my parents crumble in the hospital as they recieved news of the worst.

BEST: watching my parents be strong and united as they led us through the mists of darkness the first few weeks.

worst: truly letting it sink in that David's life on this earth is over

BEST: knowing for SURE that David's spirit continues on and is nearer to us

than I ever imagined.

worst: watching Cristina go through my worst nightmare. feeling so very helpless as I watch her cry in agony.

BEST: watching Cristina be strong and faithful,

hearing her comfort me and sharing our testimonies of forever familes.

worst: trying to help Joshua understand why his dad is gone and where he has gone.

BEST: watching and feeling

David's spirit comfort

his children and wife when no one else can.

The smile on Joshua's face as he talks about building legos with his dad.

worst: feeling so overwhelmed at the thought of how we could face the coming days and weeks.

BEST: cousins coming to the resuce from near and far to help wherever they were needed. And they were so very needed.

worst: The Kirkby's made the drive from Las Vegas and back 3 times in just over a month.

BEST: lots of good cousin time--and they made it safely every time.

worst: questioning God and His plan...He could have prevented this from happening.

BEST: Knowing for sure that God is in charge, He loves us and will help us all through.

worst: feeling like the world is spinning out of control and yet in slow motion at the same time.

BEST: knowing and feeling all the prayers of dear friends and family--all those combined prayers get us through each new day.

worst: trying to celebrate Christmas 15 days after our worlds came crashing down.

BEST: at least the kids had fun. And Ben and his family got to stay for a full 3 weeks

thanks to the timing of things.

I know that as we continue to ask for Heavenly Father's comfort and guidance, He will help us figure out how to move forward from here. We will never move on as David has left huge holes in all of our hearts, Life will never be the same. I will never be the same. But it will be okay. It will get better. It has to. There is no other option.