a letter to Josh, from Cristina

Josh :

There are so many memories I have about your daddy. I want to tell you first that he loved you and still loves you like I never knew a daddy could love. 

Daddy was a missionary when I was living in Mexico. I was about 17 when I met him. All I remember is that he was so good about making others happy and serving the lord in a magnificent way. I remember helping him with some talks and I remember your abuela Candy had a surgery once and he went to our house to visit and that was the first time he did his trick with his ring, the same one he used to show you where he put the ring in his eye and then appears on the back of his neck. He was a very funny guy. I remember one afternoon sitting outside with Tia Gaby and telling her that Elder Kenney was so serious that I won't marry a guy like him. I ate my words 'cause he ended up being the love of my life. We dated for about a year and finally I got my visa. I came to the United States on a very cold day. On January 3, 2004 I married your daddy. I was so happy, finally I found a guy that loved me for who I was, and he made my life complete. It was very hard for the first months for me to get used to this new life, i was far away from my family and daddy was all I had. He spent lots and lots of days making me feel like a queen and he did an excellent job. 

When we were dating we had an important talk about not waiting too long after we were married to have have kids. It was a little bit hard for him to accepted but as always he told me we were going to do what makes me happy. Almost 2 years after, mommy got pregnant. We were filled with joy to know there was a baby growing inside of mommy. One day we went to the doctors office to find out if we would have a boy or girl. A BOY! Your dad was so happy he was already making plans with all the activities he wanted to do with you. He was also taking all the time to mom's tummy making sure you'll recognize his voice too. The time for you to be born came one day after mom and dads second wedding anniversary. Abuela, grandma and dad were there to welcome you. A beautiful boy was born to the Kenney family. Daddy held you and he was so proud of you, I still have the picture in my mind of him and you together. Dad worked so hard that everyday after work he would spend time with you, giving you kisses, letting you sleep on his chest and repeating to himself how tiny you were and how much he loves you. He would sing to you Baby Mine or Pokey Bear. You might not remember but he loved to have  one on one time with you, going to the movies was his favorite. Teaching you how to build Legos or helping him with the train.   Life continued and we sold our house, by that time dad got laid off from work and mom was pregnant of Jasmine. Dad was so smart and spiritual that I remember him telling me that the Lord will take care of us. A few days after he got a new job at ATI. It was one hour going and one back, we were so thankful that we didn't care about the drive. He was always worry about making sure his family was safe.

A few months later we bought a new house! Dad told you it was YOURS and until today you say MY HOUSE, not moms or dads it's Joshies. After he got back from work we will drive from grandmas to where our new house was going to be built. He was so excited, you were always next to him, asking him so many questions that only he could answer. 

My sweet Josh it's very hard to write about dad, my heart is in so much pain still. I miss him so much. I know you miss him too, I have seen you cry and now that you are growing the questions are coming. I want to tell you that even though I don't quite understand why daddy went back to Heavenly Father, he loves you much, please never forget that you are part of him. You are part of an amazing family. You are a Kenney sweetie. I also want to tell you to please forgive the person responsible for this. I know you are young now, but someday you will grow and I want you to be as loving and forgiving like dad was. The person is already suffering for what he did. Someday when you are ready you can meet him because at the end of all this he owes you an apology. He might ask for you to forgive him and I hope I will be a good teacher and teach you that no matter what, we need to forget and forgive. You will be ready on your own time. 

Each day that passes we are a little bit closer to see dad again. I believe in my heart that this is only a temporal separation and we will see Papa again. He is with Heavenly Father waiting for us to come back to him. I can't wait for that day to come. I picture in my mind you, Jassy, me and dad together. I want to share my testimony with you son. I always knew the church is true, about the power of the Melchizedek priesthood but not until papa died it was when I felt the real power and the love that Heavenly Father has for us. Heavenly Father does not hate us, he had a very important calling for your dad and it was necessary for him to go back. God loves us that is why he sent you Daddy Wes. Right now I am writing this and I can hear you with him laughing and playing and my heart is full with joy. Wes loves you so much. I believe also that he was sent to us to make our path easier to walk. I am glad you are so loving that I have heard you so many times tell him I LOVE YOU. I know someday our happiness will be complete. I know that in the other side of the veil there are lots of blessings awaiting for us. Be worthy of receiving them. I love you son, you are part of my world, I want the best for you always, I want to tell you that your 2 dads and mom are very proud of you. Daddy Wes and me are very excited to see what kind of man you'll be someday. I know papa is helping us too and someday I know you will feel him close to you. You bring so much happiness into our lives. Until we get to see dad Dave, be happy, be thankful, be kind, be loving and be worthy of heavenly fathers blessings.

With all my love, your mom